On disability pride, ableism, and a tough set of emotions

Pride can be confusing for me. Yes, of course, I’m proud of my advocacy work. I’m proud of what my disability and my Cushing’s disease have led me to be. But as Disability Pride Month, celebrated in July, approached this year, I found myself feeling disconnected.

Right now, disability feels like it’s at the forefront of so many conversations, and many of my friends are on the brink of losing their healthcare. And for a moment, I lost my pride, and I just started to feel stuck.

It’s freaking hard to be disabled. It’s awful having to babble about why I’m in a wheelchair when new people ask. It’s confusing when one day I feel fabulous, and the next I’m bedridden. It’s hard to explain to employers why one day I can finish endless work, but the next I’m trudging along. Sometimes I feel like I’m almost trying to prove that my disability doesn’t disable me so that I won’t be treated differently.

But I am different. And that’s exactly what this month is all about. I get as much work done as my peers, even if it’s done a little differently. I deserve the same respect and rights that any other person has. Trying to pretend like I’m the same as everyone else is a disservice to me and the Cushing’s community.

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So when it comes to pride, where do I stand? First and foremost, becoming a part of the disabled community has broadened my horizons. I’m more aware of what my fellow disabled people need and spend more time fighting for them. I’m more in tune with what people are going through and have more empathy for people who cancel plans, don’t text back, or need time for themselves.

Disagree, but don’t belittle

That’s why it’s so important to discuss ableism, especially in this day and age. I’ve seen so many instances of people belittling disabled individuals because they disagree with them — so much so that they pretend to cut people’s oxygen, joke about how “these people” deserve to lose healthcare, and even call human beings “it.”

This year, I want to stand up for individuals more, even those I disagree with, because at the base of it, a disagreement does not necessarily mean a lack of respect. It’s not just those who stand by your side who deserve rights; it’s everyone. And as scary as it can be to point out ableism, it feels to me like it’s part of the point. We are a community, and we have to stand side by side to succeed. So many people are against us, in small and big ways. We can’t be against each other.

If I’m proud of anything this year, it’s growth. My disability doesn’t define me, that’s true, but it does guide me. And as we move further into the second half of the year, I hope to expand upon my support for my community in however many ways I can.

You can also follow my journey on TikTok and YouTube.

Note: Cushing’s Disease News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Cushing’s Disease News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to Cushing’s.