Chronically Yours
— Noura Costany

Cushing’s disease can look different from one person to the next. One may use a wheelchair, while another is in remission. Someone might be on 50 medications, and another person might need only one. Therefore, simply saying I have Cushing’s disease doesn’t really explain how it affects my body.

Despite achieving success, some people experience impostor syndrome — the feeling that they’re not good enough or haven’t earned it. They may feel like a fraud, like they’ve tricked people into believing they’re good at something. For those of us with chronic illness, impostor syndrome may cause us to wonder…

Editor’s note: This story includes discussion of suicide. If you or someone you know needs help, the national suicide and crisis lifeline in the U.S. is available by calling or texting 988. There is also an online chat at 988lifeline.org. Internationally, find a suicide prevention helpline at findahelpline.com.

In 2020, I had transsphenoidal surgery to remove a pituitary microadenoma that was the result of Cushing’s disease. In simpler terms, doctors removed a 4 mm tumor through my nose. Later, due to a recurrence of Cushing’s disease, I had another pituitary tumor. This time, though, I wasn’t a…

Editor’s note: This story includes discussion of suicide. If you or someone you know needs help, the national suicide and crisis lifeline in the U.S. is available by calling or texting 988. There is also an online chat at 988lifeline.org. Internationally, find a suicide prevention…

Cushing’s disease has affected my menstrual cycle since I got sick. I was diagnosed in 2020, but my first symptom occurred in 2018, when I stopped getting my period. Since there are many factors that can cause a missed period, I didn’t know why it was happening at first.

If you haven’t read “Moby-Dick,” you’ve probably at least heard of it. The 19th-century novel by Herman Melville tells the story of a man driven to madness by his pursuit of a giant white sperm whale. Captain Ahab’s quest for vengeance borders on obsession: The whale took his…

I groaned as I woke up in the middle of the night, overwhelmed by a sharp, relentless pain in my wrist. The ache was so intense that tears filled my eyes before I could even process what was happening. I forced myself to leave the warmth of my blanket and…

“What have you eaten lately?” “You’ve lost weight.” “You’ve gained weight.” “When’s the last time you felt that depressed?” “How much urine did you collect?” “Spit into this.” “I need your blood.” “Take off your shirt.” “The marks around your breasts? Let me see.” “Can you explain exactly how you…

I was diagnosed with Cushing’s disease in 2020 after several years of suffering and searching for answers. Since then, many different people have told me their opinions on my illness or given me unsolicited advice. For instance, they’ll say that using my wheelchair less will help my muscles or ask…

Last June, my partner and I moved from New York City to Michigan. I was very involved with the healthcare system in New York, for better or worse. I was diagnosed with Cushing’s disease in 2020, and even though my main doctor is in Los Angeles, I still…

Right now, I’m doing a round of Cushing’s disease testing. I was originally diagnosed in 2020, and two years after my first pituitary tumor was removed, I was diagnosed with a recurrence. It’s now been two years since I’ve done any testing, and my endocrinologist wants to do a…