Anime series changes how I view myself and my place in the world

I’m a huge anime fan. It’s one of the only things that pulls me up when I’m feeling especially down.

I recently started watching a new anime show called “A Sign of Affection.” I was hesitant to watch it at first because the main character, Yuki, is deaf, and I haven’t seen much anime — or other types of shows, for that matter — that portrays disabilities in an affirming way.

The show is about a short romance between two characters who fall desperately in love. Unlike some romance movies and television shows, where a couple doesn’t get together until the end, the protagonists in “A Sign of Affection” start their relationship early on in the series. Yuki’s love interest, Itsuomi, sets out to learn new cultures and expand his languages, including learning sign language.

I was surprised by how much I loved the series. I’m not deaf, and my disability from Cushing’s disease and other conditions is different. But I’ve had similar fears as Yuki, who often feels lost in a crowd and struggles with insecurities. What’s beautiful to me is that Itsuomi adores Yuki because of both her disability and her worldview.

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Observing my own strengths

My husband and I have had several conversations about my insecurities regarding our relationship. I have a lingering fear that my husband wouldn’t have chosen me if we’d gotten together after I got sick. But my husband said, “It’s like the terms and conditions for something you love. You don’t even read it, because it doesn’t matter. You want it no matter what. If I’d read the terms and conditions for our relationship, I would’ve accepted in a heartbeat.”

I’d never considered that I see the world differently because of my disability. Unbeknownst to me, I provide a different worldview to my husband. After watching the show, I sat down and asked myself the positive ways that my disability makes me different. Here’s what I came up with:

1. My illness involves hormones, so I have a lot of insight into how hormones affect people.

2. My line of sight is different when I’m in my wheelchair. I can see children more closely, including how they react to certain things. I can also see people’s hands more closely, and how they use them while interacting with others.

3. My friends are always comfortable approaching me with their problems, because I’m extra sensitive about what others are going through.

4. My body has changed so much that I’ve learned to embrace body acceptance. It’s a trait I’ll make sure to pass on to my own children one day.

5. I sometimes treat my illness like a bridge I can use to help others.

I often hear a poignant statement made in the disabled community: “Your disability is not a burden; society is a burden on you.” I believe that’s true, but it’s also difficult to internalize it. While I may not always feel great about myself or trust in what I can bring to the table, “A Sign of Affection” showed me that I do see the world differently. I’m lovable because of my illness and disability, not in spite of them.

You can also follow my journey on TikTok and YouTube.

Note: Cushing’s Disease News is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Cushing’s Disease News or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to Cushing’s.